Sunday, September 30, 2007

the rise and gradual fall of a daily victory

Breaking news. I'm the kind of jacka$$ that can write several posts about how she hates everyone and then turn around just as swiftly to tell you that I went to a party on Saturday that was actually very pleasant with very pleasant people who happened to also be medical students. And sadly, I can also tell you that I'll probably be complaining about those same people in another two weeks, once the stress level kicks up near the time of an exam and everyone turns into gremlins again.

Saturday was the kind of day that turned Sunday into recovery, even though there was nothing wrong with Saturday. It's classic introvert behavior. On Saturday, I had to attend a big event in the morning that involved a lot of mingling. Now, this mingling was of the good variety (i.e. it did not involve mingling with other students) and it was extremely meaningful. But it also required a lot of energy.

On the walk home, I had resolved to make something for the party I was attending that evening. I know it would have been quicker to pop into the ever-beloved Trader Joe's, and it probably would have been better for everyone involved if I had. But once some foolhardy notion gets lodged into my head, it's surprising (or perhaps not that surprising to those who know me) how difficult it is to change course.

I have this bad habit of not testing out recipes before dinner parties. Technically, I am totally opposed to bringing experiments over for parties, yet in practice, it seems to almost always happen exactly that way. This adds an undue element of stress, but I am slowly starting to come to terms with the fact that I actually require a certain level of stress in my life. I'm not the sort of person who runs completely and solely on stress-- if I'm overwhelmed, I can get paralyzed. But a healthy dose of stress, that I seem to require just to motivate myself to snap out of inertia.

Anyway, end result:

In case anyone really is curious, which I sincerely doubt, I followed a recipe that can be found here. And when I say I followed the recipe, I use that term in the loosest possible sense of the word. If you actually follow the link, you will see that it is a recipe for Cheddar Cheese Chive Bread. And what I made consisted of basil, parmesan cheese, mozzarella cheese, and a layer of sun-dried tomato pesto. Clearly, I have a problem with authority. Also, I clearly am not in top form when it comes to baking. I was in a bit of a rush so it wasn't exactly the most aesthetically pleasing bread. But it was edible, which was really all I was going for with such a slap-happy attempt.

Then it was off to the party, and today, all I wanted to do was curl up on my couch and watch awful movies. So maybe I did not accomplish a lot this weekend. But it was kind of nice, for a day or two, to suspend reality and pretend I was someone with this kind of leisure time on her hands. I figure if I pretend for long enough, I might just become someone who actually has the time.

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