some days I think I'd feel better if I tried harder

I'd just recovered from the last time there was a black-out in hellville my neighborhood. Granted, it has been at least 6 months since the last time, but:

• that time, it lasted for over 4 days and ruined almost the entire contents of my refrigerator.
  
• the building I occupy is so dilapidated and poorly wired that the place spontaneously blows a fuse if I have the A/C going for more than an hour. This led to a few hair-raising moments of returning home after a brief sojourn out and about this summer to find my refrigerator without power again.
  
• I just went grocery shopping yesterday and I have those two batches of gelati mentioned in my last post sitting in my freezer. Sadness. Furthermore, there is some cookie dough in there as well- also, no fair.

Last time this happened, I had some serious anger management issues I had to wrestle. I was generally unhappy about various things and the electricity shorting out for almost a week was kind of the rancid whipped cream on a cup of lukewarm hot chocolate actually made of carobs. This time, it wasn't so bad- I am generally more content at the moment, and also a bit more aware of my utter helplessness in such a situation.

As it happened, it was an extremely quick black-out- fixed within an hour. But remaining so calm disturbed me too. Count on me, never satisfied. But I mean, is this what has become of my life? I've just become accepting of flat-out power shortages, the inevitable rotting of my freezer contents, the very hot condition of my apartment without any fans running? I feel like I did during vacations visiting my paternal grandmother in a small village in Gujarat, although, truth be told, I suspect if I went back there now, the little bungalow would have better electrical wiring than my current crack-shack.

I used to accuse my friend AL of being too content with life. I thought it was holding him back from making changes that would really make him happier. After all, if you make your life too comfortable, what will ever fuel you to strive for more? He eventually did make those changes, and was all the better for it. I sometimes think if you merged our two life philosophies, you would have a well-balanced human who actually did things on a proper timeline.

I try to tell myself I'll just appreciate it all the more when I live in a presentable place that is fully-functioning. But you know, I tell myself a lot of things, and very few of them are true. Isn't that always the way?

Speaking of fantasies, I hope you all have watched Dr. Horrible's Singalong. Only the NPH can add the phrases "Whatever!" and "Balls" to a musical without missing a beat.