Tuesday, February 22, 2005

and you hunger for the time

Oh crikey, talk about your girlie behavior- some evil coworker came into my office and dropped off a chocolate frosted brownie and I took it. Dude, at 5pm though? How's a person supposed to resist that? (best Kyle voice) You bastards! Worst part? I ate the whole mother-loving thing, and now, it's like there's a brick in my stomach. Oh, thanks, that feels great. It's going to feel even better when I run for three miles later tonight.

In other news, I've been using my POM bottle as a water bottle, and it is completely confusing the hell out of people. Best reaction? A woman who asked me "How did they get all the color out of the pomegranate juice?" File it under I can't make this crap up.

Am I on crazy pills, or did Bono just get nominated for a Nobel? Well slap a pair of oversized sunglasses on me and send me to Congress. You know... I am wistful for old U2. I miss them, man. Really. Random tangent: my brother & I call one of my cousins Sanjay, bloody Sanjay- and yes, we are dorks.

Am I on crazier pills, or did a poll just say 6 out of 10 people think the US is ready for a leader who is a woman? Which 10 people did they poll? Why do I not believe it? And could the Democratic party please light themselves on fire and dance? Because that's about the same thing as considering Hillary Rodham Clinton as a candidate for President. Dude, you guys couldn't get Kerry elected, and he's harmless, uncontroversial, and his opponent was a foolio. Hillary won't get elected. Is it because she's a woman? Not really. It's because she's unlikable. Sorry, but it's true. You want to put a President in the office? You need charisma, baby. Because, to quote my man Jules, personality goes a long way. Really, the women cited in the poll as potential candidates were laughable:
  • Clinton- see reasons cited above, including tendency of people to refer to her as that cold bitch from NYC
  • Condi- come on, seriously. Who are you kidding? You've got a double whammy- double minority status. And you've also got the unlikable thing going against you. And the fact that you appear to be George's toadie.
  • Elizabeth Dole- it was over for you when Bob started to appear in Viagra ads.
This is more evidence of why I hate the media, and polls. You can get them to tell you anything you really want to hear. Would I like to see a woman as president? Sure, why not? Do I know of any women who could run and win? Not just now. Hell, I don't even know of any men who could run and win, right now. I know, I know, I'm a hater.

You know why else I'm a hater? Because I'm kind of celebrating a little at the news that Blink-182 is on indefinite hiatus. One less boy band-that makes fun of girlier boy bands out there. Although Maroon 5 make Blink seem as punk as Fugazi.

Since I was on the topic of Bob Dole and those Viagra ads, sort of... man, they are really taking all that DTC advertising way too far. If we're going to complain about seeing Janet Jackson's nipple, then watching old people make creepy schmoopy eyes at each other deserves filing a grievance or two. Luckily, it looks like some pressure may be applied to get the FDA to crack down on this. Which basically means the FDA will be forced to do its job. Gee, I think I'm going to try to use that excuse the next time I fall behind at work- sorry, no one got on my case about this every hour, so I figured I could just surf the net for the day. Isn't that some kind of Costanza logic?

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