Saturday, January 12, 2008

you're getting to be a habit with me

Ummmm... yeah, checking in and interrupting a case of serious writer's block. Also, it's not right the beginning of school has coincided with the AFC/NFC playoffs. A few little notes to the boys:

    Dear Brett Favre,
    I still cannot pronounce your last name, but I take back everything else I've ever said about you (even that stuff about how football players shouldn't cry). Nice work.

    Dear Rodney Harrison,
    Good job with the interception tonight, but dude? Can you calm the f*** down? Can we go one game without you getting a flag for doing something based solely on spazziness? Remember when you said 'youth is overrated'? How about acting like you're a grown up.

    Dear Ladanian Tomlinson,
    I was as shocked as you when we beat you last year. Now do me a favor and kick some Colts' a$$. Bellichick wouldn't give it up, but I think we all know that the less Peyton Manning seen on the tele, the better.

    Dear announcers,
    Oh you guys have a few things coming your way:

    1) Make up your mind. I don't know why everyone's complaining about the media changing their position on Clinton and Obama every few days. Tune into any NFL game and you can see that kind of work every few minutes. It would be fine except that y'all are so prone to hyperbole. Stop calling the Pats the best team ever and then in the next breath mutter how crappy their defense is. You can't have it both ways and you don't get to call them the best team ever yet. Those kinds of titles take more time than getting a first down and 4th & 6.

    2) Quit talking about Tony Romo in terms of his girlfriend.

    3) Just so you don't think I'm totally against you, please know that I am forever grateful that you put Bryant Gumbel back onto the undoubtedly unwatched NFL network.

    All the best,

I think I may have to dismantle my television set tomorrow so I can focus on more important things. Then again, I'll also have to throw away the Junot Diaz, as I spent all morning reading that instead of Immunology. But truth be told, I have to believe there's some connection- as Diaz himself (or at least the protagonist in his novel) would say- is there anything more sci-fi than Immunology? Well, we haven't gotten to Microbiology, but until then, B-cells & T-cells occupy fantasy-- and with that, I'm back to the fellowship of the immunoglobulins.

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