and I've made up my mind

Dudes, I have problems again. I'm listening to Whitesnake, y'all. Okay, in my defense, I was stressing about shizz, and then I clicked up Here I Go Again, and immediately, nothing but laughter, b*tches. I was talking to AL about it and we sussed out yet another key difference between men and women. When I hear this song, I get a visual of Will Ferrell hazing frat boys. When guys hear this song, they get a visual of Tawny Kitaen demonstrating remarkable flexibility on the hoods of cars.

So, actually, I don't really have problems. Except a few mental problems that resulted in me forgetting to bring my camera adapter thingamajob to work today, meaning that I cannot show you the pictures I took yesterday. After a long, ridiculous hiatus, I returned home yesterday to my kitchen, my beloved, ancient kitchen. It looked sad and mopey, and that made no sense. AL changed the light bulb in the kitchen when he visited, so it is actually bright and cheerful in there now. But the oven and the baking rack still looked forlorn. Not anymore, though. I made a batch of cheesecakes for JI who works on my team.

I was a little concerned, because I was having a bit of a tiff with SP on the phone while I was preparing the cheesecakes. My concerns existed on two levels. First, multi-tasking can often end in disaster when baking. I don't know how many times I have thrown in eggs before they were called for because of a distraction of some kind. Secondly, I guess I believe, completely irrationally, that baking is a little like growing plants. Maybe it's just that I got a little carried away the first time I saw Como agua para chocolate, but I am of the conviction that your feelings can alter the flavor of your food. Add in a dash of rust because I haven't really done anything in the kitchen, and you have the makings for a world-class fiasco. I'm just glad that the conversation got really tense after the cheesecakes were already baking in the oven.

The one thing I had going for me is what I always seem to have going for me: I didn't really care. If it turned out okay, cool. If not, I would have still had time to buy cupcakes in the morning. As it turned out, they turned out just okay. Not phenomenal enough to proudly give JI for her birthday (though I did anyway, for I have no shame), not horribly enough to throw away altogether.

But that was a little besides the point. The real point was breaking the barrier. When you fall out of a habit, there reaches a point where it becomes much harder to return to it than to continue to avoid it. And oh, am I ever the avoid-er to end all avoid-ers (part of the reason for the cross exchange with SP). So, when I actually do get my act together and return to an old friend in this way, I am surprised to find so much pleasure in the reunion.

All of this to say, the baking, it is back. Expect boring pictures to follow, and secret packages to be sent. I only wish I had got it together in time for Chai's birthday- except that she has disclosed that she is not much for sweet baked goods. Man, I wish I could borrow some of her genes that produced that disinclination.