you know what you've got to do

Since I have started to eat healthier lunches, I have noticed two things. By healthier lunches, I mean that I tend to eat healthier food, and even though I probably eat the same amount as always, I end up having a little something every few hours. The first thing that I have noticed is that I have more energy. The second thing I have noticed is that I am grumpier. So, basically, eating healthier has made me an energetic b*tch. Which is just what this world needed.

Tonight, if I can get out of this rat trap of a job in the next two hours, I will be rummaging through my apartment for a pair of tickets I purchased last month. If my scavenger hunt is successful, it will result in me dragging SP to go see DeVotchKa. DeVotchKa, DeVotchKa, DeVotchKa, I could say it a million times with too much flare. And if the show is half as good as their music, there will be no living with me. I'll be saying DeVotchKa until someone slaps some sense into me.

I received a really lovely email from Maitri today that completely brightened my day. After that, I got a phone call from W in Germany, announcing the birth of his daughter. Neither of them can really know how much I needed it today. Out here on the blogosphere, I always seem like I am teetering on the verge of insanity. But I have been really feeling a bit down in the dumps about all kinds of stuff. The kind of stuff that creeps up on you, and burrows itself into a nest of insecurities, weighing you down with, well, bullsh*t. I was thinking this week that I need to get it together. I say that a lot, to myself, in my head- get it together! Sometimes, half of what I write here is an attempt to snap myself out of such a slump.

But all the self-motivational speeches and trash-talkings to myself do not compare to hearing from someone else. It doesn't even have to be praise. It just has to be a kind of contact, the kind that gives you assurance that even if you fall smack on your face, even with bloody hands and a forehead covered in mud, you will not be regarded as a complete and utter failure.